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Craig Younkin
Movie Review
The Wild
By Craig Younkin Published April 10, 2006
US Release: April 14, 2006
Directed by: Steve Williams
Starring: Kiefer Sutherland , Eddie Izzard
G
Running Time: 94 minutes
Domestic Box Office: $37,371,315
Directed by: Steve Williams
Starring: Kiefer Sutherland , Eddie Izzard
G
Running Time: 94 minutes
Domestic Box Office: $37,371,315
D+
Don't expect any touching life lessons. Don't expect entertainment either. The characters are drawn like stuffed animals and their facial expressions make them seem like they're completely devoid of personality.
I wonder if they have multiplexes in heaven - cause if they do, Walt Disney must be pretty pissed lately. I also hope they have "The Wall Street Journal" up there too because if I didn't know Disney agreed to a deal with Pixar, I'd say the company is pretty much dead. With garbage like "The Wild," how could you think any other way? This movie is, like the rest of the children's films that come out nowadays, a buddy-comedy featuring animals. Movies with actual stories like "Aladdin" and "Beauty and the Beast" are apparently too hard to come by anymore. Nonetheless, like the "Ice Age" films and "Madagascar" showed, these films can still be bearable if they were actually funny. Apparently this was too hard for Disney to come by.
The story begins exactly the same way "Madagascar" does in the New York Zoo. Samson the Lion (Kiefer Sutherland) has a great roar and everybody loves him because he is a turtle-curling champion. If you don't think Disney has lost its way, consider how it's gone from magic carpet rides to curling. His son Ryan (Greg Cipes) has an itty bitty roar and is far from being anything that even resembles a champion. So Ryan feels inadequate and runs away, leaving Samson and his friends, a squirrel (Jim Belushi), a giraffe (Janeane Garafalo), a koala (Eddie Izzard), and a snake (who for some reason was not listed on IMDB), to escape from the zoo and try to get Ryan back. Short story shorter, they end up back in the wild. As a matter of fact, it is Madagascar.
The only difference is that this movie contains a really sentimental and boring father-son dynamic in which the son wants to be like dad but dad's not that great, and then they learn to be great together. Long story short, it's basically just a gimmick to move the plot along before ending in a trite and pointless way. Don't expect any touching life lessons here. Don't expect entertainment either. The characters in this movie are drawn like stuffed animals and their facial expressions make them seem like they're completely devoid of personality. It's not like the writing (by six people for crying out loud!) helps much. The humor is broad stupidity trying to masquerade as comedy - German, Italian, Arab accents, really old fart and poop jokes; it's all really lame at this point.
The cast is just here for a paycheck and is really miscast, especially Kiefer Sutherland, who has no delivery in, or business trying to do comedy - he's Jack Bauer! Give him a gun and a reason and he'll give you better results. "The Wild" is just plain old lame. This thing should have gone directly to video and saved Walt the trouble of crying in the back row.
The story begins exactly the same way "Madagascar" does in the New York Zoo. Samson the Lion (Kiefer Sutherland) has a great roar and everybody loves him because he is a turtle-curling champion. If you don't think Disney has lost its way, consider how it's gone from magic carpet rides to curling. His son Ryan (Greg Cipes) has an itty bitty roar and is far from being anything that even resembles a champion. So Ryan feels inadequate and runs away, leaving Samson and his friends, a squirrel (Jim Belushi), a giraffe (Janeane Garafalo), a koala (Eddie Izzard), and a snake (who for some reason was not listed on IMDB), to escape from the zoo and try to get Ryan back. Short story shorter, they end up back in the wild. As a matter of fact, it is Madagascar.
The only difference is that this movie contains a really sentimental and boring father-son dynamic in which the son wants to be like dad but dad's not that great, and then they learn to be great together. Long story short, it's basically just a gimmick to move the plot along before ending in a trite and pointless way. Don't expect any touching life lessons here. Don't expect entertainment either. The characters in this movie are drawn like stuffed animals and their facial expressions make them seem like they're completely devoid of personality. It's not like the writing (by six people for crying out loud!) helps much. The humor is broad stupidity trying to masquerade as comedy - German, Italian, Arab accents, really old fart and poop jokes; it's all really lame at this point.
The cast is just here for a paycheck and is really miscast, especially Kiefer Sutherland, who has no delivery in, or business trying to do comedy - he's Jack Bauer! Give him a gun and a reason and he'll give you better results. "The Wild" is just plain old lame. This thing should have gone directly to video and saved Walt the trouble of crying in the back row.
Craig's Grade: D+
Craig's Overall Grading: 340 graded movies
| A | 10.9% | |
| B | 41.8% | |
| C | 31.8% | |
| D | 15.3% | |
| F | 0.3% |
