- Review: John Wick 3 (C)
Scott Sycamore - Weekend Box Office
May 17 - 19 - Crowd Reports
Avengers: Endgame - Us
Box office comparisons - Review: Justice League (C)
Craig Younkin
Movie Review
The Longest Yard
By Lee Tistaert Published April 30, 2005
US Release: May 27, 2005
Directed by: Peter Segal
Starring: Adam Sandler , Chris Rock , Burt Reynolds , Michael Irvin
PG-13
Running Time: 109 minutes
Domestic Box Office: $158,115,031
Directed by: Peter Segal
Starring: Adam Sandler , Chris Rock , Burt Reynolds , Michael Irvin
PG-13
Running Time: 109 minutes
Domestic Box Office: $158,115,031
C
87 of 143
This is the kind of very generic and stupid comedy that could?ve opened in the dumping ground of early spring.
Teaming up Adam Sandler and Chris Rock seemed like a hopeful idea. Although The Longest Yard is PG-13, whereas Rock?s sensibility is very foul (with his stand-up comedy), you would think the material would be suited for their talents. Since I didn?t like the trailer, I figured the studio might be saving the movie?s good moments, but I was dead wrong. This has got to be one of the most anticipated duos of the summer, and the movie happens to be one big disappointment.
Adam Sandler stars as former football legend, Paul ?Wrecking? Crewe. The movie starts up at a party where Paul is being cornered by his high-maintenance girlfriend (played by Courteney Cox in a wasted role); he is upstairs, away from everyone else, and is glued to a football game on television. Intent on avoiding her and the party, he manages to lock her in the bedroom closet and takes her really expensive car out for a reckless cruise in the city. He?s also very drunk and gets pulled over by police considering she just reported the car as stolen.
Paul is arrested and placed in jail in the middle of nowhere, but he discovers that the warden has a specific plan for him. His athletic abilities are very well known, and the warden wants him to train the convicts for a face-off with the guards. The guards in the prison are ruthless and attack everyone, and the convicts want their revenge. Paul also meets another convict nicknamed Caretaker (Chris Rock), and they become friends and help each other train the inmates.
I know a plot in a movie like this isn?t first priority, and attacking it can be a little silly, but the movie is so poorly packaged. I can handle breezy story setups, but considering the caliber of the jokes, I was forced to attack the story for its lame framework. The reason the trailers don?t have any real jokes is that movie doesn?t have any real jokes. The Longest Yard mostly involves a collection of physical gags; people punch each other and tackle each other to the ground, and that?s a lot of the movie. Chris Rock is even given a few foul words, but the moments are so forced and dry that it?s just a failed attempt to look like the real Chris Rock. There?s a moment in the trailer in which Rock exclaims, ?Who are we going to kiss?? and the inmates accidentally scream, ?The guards!? That is the caliber of most of the jokes in the movie.
The movie is a cross of The Waterboy (C+), Mr. Deeds (C), The Ladykillers (C), and Friday Night Lights (B). I thought Waterboy was kind of annoying but it had its moments ? and as sad as it sounds, it actually had more of a story than this does. The Longest Yard is about as illogical in structure as Mr. Deeds and it has a lot of slapstick like Ladykillers (an area of comedy I?m not a fan of). The football scenes are also relevant to Friday Night Lights, but only in their depiction of intimate tackles. There are very brutal hits and blows that players endure, and the movie takes you up close and personal. The movie might play well with hardcore football fans looking for physical intensity, but the ?Ooooh!? reaction is all the sequences are meant to induce.
The movie is being a marketed as a Sandler/Rock duo, but Chris Rock only has about fifteen or twenty minutes of screen time, which will likely upset some of his fans. Burt Reynolds also stars as a legendary football coach who commits to the training, but his role is as effective as it was in Without a Paddle (C+). Both of these movies are very silly, and I thought the trio in that comedy had an easygoing chemistry even though the movie wasn?t that funny. You can tell Sandler and Rock like being around each other, but the material is so lifeless that chemistry wouldn?t do much.
Despite all of this, the movie is bound to be a big hit (and probably bigger than Anger Management). The audience at this screening was enjoying the movie a lot more than I was (the reactions were even better than they were for Dodgeball), but I sensed part of the excitement might?ve been the ?early screening? factor (with everyone being so hyper). It didn?t take much to induce chuckles and laughs (and even some claps) from this crowd, and nearly every physical gag brought out a painful blow from the audience. Perhaps this movie just wasn?t for me, but I was a fan of Billy Madison (B) and Happy Gilmore (B-), and even Head of State (B-).
The Longest Yard isn?t what you?d call an ?An Adam Sandler movie.? He doesn?t have any outrageous outbursts that fans usually love, and he isn?t handed very many jokes either. The movie mainly focuses on the physical brutality and the oddball inmates; it just so happens to feature Sandler and Rock. The movie demands that you have an extremely leisurely state of mind, and practically requests that you don?t have any active brain cells. This is the kind of very generic and stupid comedy that could?ve opened in the dumping ground of early spring with any other comedians out there; it?s lucky to open in summer when moviegoers will definitely see it.
Adam Sandler stars as former football legend, Paul ?Wrecking? Crewe. The movie starts up at a party where Paul is being cornered by his high-maintenance girlfriend (played by Courteney Cox in a wasted role); he is upstairs, away from everyone else, and is glued to a football game on television. Intent on avoiding her and the party, he manages to lock her in the bedroom closet and takes her really expensive car out for a reckless cruise in the city. He?s also very drunk and gets pulled over by police considering she just reported the car as stolen.
Paul is arrested and placed in jail in the middle of nowhere, but he discovers that the warden has a specific plan for him. His athletic abilities are very well known, and the warden wants him to train the convicts for a face-off with the guards. The guards in the prison are ruthless and attack everyone, and the convicts want their revenge. Paul also meets another convict nicknamed Caretaker (Chris Rock), and they become friends and help each other train the inmates.
I know a plot in a movie like this isn?t first priority, and attacking it can be a little silly, but the movie is so poorly packaged. I can handle breezy story setups, but considering the caliber of the jokes, I was forced to attack the story for its lame framework. The reason the trailers don?t have any real jokes is that movie doesn?t have any real jokes. The Longest Yard mostly involves a collection of physical gags; people punch each other and tackle each other to the ground, and that?s a lot of the movie. Chris Rock is even given a few foul words, but the moments are so forced and dry that it?s just a failed attempt to look like the real Chris Rock. There?s a moment in the trailer in which Rock exclaims, ?Who are we going to kiss?? and the inmates accidentally scream, ?The guards!? That is the caliber of most of the jokes in the movie.
The movie is a cross of The Waterboy (C+), Mr. Deeds (C), The Ladykillers (C), and Friday Night Lights (B). I thought Waterboy was kind of annoying but it had its moments ? and as sad as it sounds, it actually had more of a story than this does. The Longest Yard is about as illogical in structure as Mr. Deeds and it has a lot of slapstick like Ladykillers (an area of comedy I?m not a fan of). The football scenes are also relevant to Friday Night Lights, but only in their depiction of intimate tackles. There are very brutal hits and blows that players endure, and the movie takes you up close and personal. The movie might play well with hardcore football fans looking for physical intensity, but the ?Ooooh!? reaction is all the sequences are meant to induce.
The movie is being a marketed as a Sandler/Rock duo, but Chris Rock only has about fifteen or twenty minutes of screen time, which will likely upset some of his fans. Burt Reynolds also stars as a legendary football coach who commits to the training, but his role is as effective as it was in Without a Paddle (C+). Both of these movies are very silly, and I thought the trio in that comedy had an easygoing chemistry even though the movie wasn?t that funny. You can tell Sandler and Rock like being around each other, but the material is so lifeless that chemistry wouldn?t do much.
Despite all of this, the movie is bound to be a big hit (and probably bigger than Anger Management). The audience at this screening was enjoying the movie a lot more than I was (the reactions were even better than they were for Dodgeball), but I sensed part of the excitement might?ve been the ?early screening? factor (with everyone being so hyper). It didn?t take much to induce chuckles and laughs (and even some claps) from this crowd, and nearly every physical gag brought out a painful blow from the audience. Perhaps this movie just wasn?t for me, but I was a fan of Billy Madison (B) and Happy Gilmore (B-), and even Head of State (B-).
The Longest Yard isn?t what you?d call an ?An Adam Sandler movie.? He doesn?t have any outrageous outbursts that fans usually love, and he isn?t handed very many jokes either. The movie mainly focuses on the physical brutality and the oddball inmates; it just so happens to feature Sandler and Rock. The movie demands that you have an extremely leisurely state of mind, and practically requests that you don?t have any active brain cells. This is the kind of very generic and stupid comedy that could?ve opened in the dumping ground of early spring with any other comedians out there; it?s lucky to open in summer when moviegoers will definitely see it.
Lee's Grade: C
Ranked #87 of 143 between Corpse Bride (#86) and The Ringer (#88) for 2005 movies.
Ranked #87 of 143 between Corpse Bride (#86) and The Ringer (#88) for 2005 movies.
Lee's Overall Grading: 3025 graded movies
| A | 0.4% | |
| B | 30.0% | |
| C | 61.7% | |
| D | 8.0% | |
| F | 0.0% |
'The Longest Yard' Articles
- Craig's review D
May 28, 2005 The movie's constant run of gay bashing is mean-spirited, misguided, and nothing short of easy humor, taking the very low road that so many prison and Sandler comedies have taken before. -- Craig Younkin - Friday Box Office Analysis (5/27)
May 28, 2005 Considering the football premise and the tie-ins with Waterboy, a bigger than usual second day increase (for Sandler) could be in store. -- Lee Tistaert
